"You leave me no choice, here comes the smolder."

This is pretty much tight.

People from all around the world are reading my blog!


United States

France

Australia

South Korea

Malaysia

Russia

Slovakia

Austria

Canada

Denmark

Now if only people in South America, Africa, and Antarctica [not likely] would read my blog I'd have readers from every continent!

EDIT: Also India and United Kingdom!

EDIT2: and Singapore.

EDIT3: Italy

EDIT4: Hungary

EDIT5: Slovenia

"We got married and our flower girl was a leopard in a tutu. "

I died a little on the inside today.

I blame my Mother for it.

I haven't heard this horrid song in over a year.

CHRISTMAS SHOES.

She just had to click the link on Heather's facebook.

Then when she found out what it was, she just HAD to watch the rest of the video.

I don't understand why oh why someone would write a song like this?

Why would someone try to buy shoes for their dying mother?

Wouldn't they want to spend the last moments with her instead of buying shoes?

I mean COME ON, shoes are a worldly thing! She's not going to take them with her in heaven!

Save your money for the funeral or SOMETHING.

I say that Christmas Shoes is the worst Christmas songs ever.

Santa Baby is a close second.

"When people eat s'mores, I only eat the graham crackers and marshmallow."

I've been known as grandma in the drama class ever since September.

My grand kids often joke to me that I should make them cookies.

Well, I was bored one day and I thought I should celebrate:

1. Having practice end early
2. Permission to go to the midnight showing of Harry Potter

I start to make Snicker-doodles and vanilla was one of the ingredients.

I ponder to myself that when I was younger I tasted the vanilla and I thought it was repulsive.

But since this was PURE vanilla extract, I thought it would taste better.

It wasn't.

So I taste it again.

Still wasn't.

I mean, third time is the charm right?

I gag.

I finish making the dough for the cookies.

Then I see I have to make the cinnamon sugar.

Hm... well I tried the vanilla extract, should I taste ground cinnamon too?

I remember when I was younger Jennifer and I would always make cinnamon toast.

She wasn't there to make the 'cinnamon sugar' so I just put ground cinnamon on my toast.

It was awful... Worst. Toast. Ever.

Of course, I try ground cinnamon.

GROSS.
(Now that I have to draw clothes on, my head looks abnormally large.)

I think I learned my lesson.

It was bad the first time around, not going to try it a second or third time.

I can confidently say I don't like vanilla extract or ground cinnamon.

But, at least my grand kids liked the cookies.

"I want to make babies and it's taking too long!"

I ran out of inspiration to blog guys, I am so sorry.

So, I was thinking to myself how much my hair changes and I decided to do a memoir to my hair.

I know I have so many years missing since I can't find any...

Also, don't judge when you see my....not so attractive stage in life.

(I'm a present!)

(Ready for school a few years early)

(Don't remember this at all)

(Nor this)

(Heather, if you want me to take this out I glady will for your sake.)

(I wish my hair still looked like this naturally)

(KITTY!)

(CHICKIES!)

(I haven't ridden a quad in forever.)

(Freezing water....)

(8th grade graduation candid shot)

(Freshman hair. Longest hair I ever had. I miss it. RIP)

(Pyramid. It hurt so bad falling.)

(A huge spider fell on me after this picture, while I was oblivious.)

(Lauren, in Duffel, not doing our work.)

(Stefani did my hair.)

(Right before I chopped it off!)

(Our sexy faces)

(Kandie and I, last day of Journalism)

(Natural hair)

(Senior picture! That ONE piece of hair on the left bugs me sooo much!)


Rest in piece long hair, RIP.

"She was in my face and smelled like a turkey sandwich."

So I saw the midnight showing of Harry Potter on Thursday/Friday.

It was pretty much bomb.

I dressed up as Luna Lovegood, even though I look nothing like her

Nerdy glasses? Check.
Gryffindor robe? Check.
Red tie? Check.
Ticket? Check.
Scar? Check.
Sweets to sneak into the theater? Check.
Wand? Well, I was going to get one off the ground but it never happened.

(You just just HAD to make me draw clothes on... ugh.)

I get to the theater around 8... there are SO many people there already!

We were third in line, which was pretty much awesome, (Thank you Nora for getting there around 2pm!)

I chilled with Stacie, checked to see how long the line was (very very long.), and we went to Safeway to get food.

We ran back to the line from Safeway since we heard they were numbering our tickets, we sprinted VERY fast.

After we we ran and screamed, Stacie decided to open up her carbonated water.

Since she forgot she ran, it exploded EVERYWHERE.

Including on me, herself, and Ashley.

Great fun eh? Stickyness galore!

We were pretty much bored to death.. and it was cold.

I munched on Starbursts, Gobstoppers, and White Cheddar Popcorn while the movie was playing.

I hid in Kalum's shoulder when there were scary parts and I accidentally hit him in the face once..

I got to bed around 3am, woke up at 4:30am.

1 1/2 hours of sleep.

But it was worth it.

"IT'S NAKED TIME! - Dumbledore [Potter Puppet Pals] "

So, after much deliberation...

...I have decided that my readers have their say...

...on whether or not the constant nakedness of my drawings disturbs them.

Vote on my poll for your say.

Yesh. [=

(By the way, it closed already. You guys won. DANG IT.)

"Stop trying to hold my hand!"

I often have to wait for my parents to pick me up after play practice.

Not that I'm complaining or anything...

I always have a certain rock, a very special rock I stand on.

Since it's about 7:3opm or so when I get out there, it's often dark, so dark your really can't see me.

While I'm standing on the rock, I like to sing:


Opera, to be exact.

But I don't sing just on the rock, I sing from the theater, going to the rock.

Which means that I have to pass quite a few cars in the front of the school.

Of course, I always look to see who is driving the car to see if I know them.

I'm pretty sure they're judging, since I can see the look on their face when they see me singing opera.

Often I see people getting in or out their cars and people stare at me and give me that, "What are you smokin'?" look when they also hear me.

I sing various things; like Phantom of the Opera, Wicked, The Music Man, and other various fun songs I can think of.

Oh how I love waiting to get picked up, it brings me great joy into my life.

"Why is your pinkie fingernail so pointy?" "Better to pick out ear wax, my dear."

Onions.

My arch-nemesis.

Cutting them are the WORST.

I make dinner every Sunday, and I had the privilege to cut green pepper, red pepper, mushrooms, and ONIONS.

I start cutting the onions quickly, hoping that my eyes won't water and my mascara will smear everywhere.

Oh boy but they did. Here comes the water works. One, two, three, four, I lost count how many tears are shed.

I go to my bathroom to take off my make-up and WOO, a face only a Mother could love.

I did what anyone would do.


Get some goggles woo!

I proceeded to cut onions and success! No more crying!

Yeah, I know. I'm so cool I made ice cubes look hot.

"That was a random spazz attack."

Floral Design was pretty much bomb.

We're learning the color wheel and how you have to mix colors to make new colors.
(So elementary school, I know.)

What was even more elementary schoolish is that we got to use blue, red, and yellow PLAY-DOH.

We had to mix play-doh to get secondary and tertiary colors.

Of course, when I completed my color wheel I took some extra play-doh with me.

I played with it throughout my classes... just rolling it around in my hands calmed me.

Of course, my friends were extremely jealous, and insisted that I would share with them.

We made a flattened frog, a turtle, a snail, an Oompa Lompa, an ice cream cone, an alligator, a statue of a weird guy, a burrito, and I'm sure there was more.

Yeah, you know you're jealous.

" If you ever get cancer and you lose your hair, I'll donate my hair for your wig."

I have the most horrible dream last night.

This tale is NOT for the faint hearted!

I really don't remember how it all started. But then again it's a nightmare, who really remembers these things?

I believe I was in a cardboard box in an alley with stink rays eminating from my body.


I was homeless, obviously since I DID live in a box, a refrigerator box to be exact. Nice and roomy.

Why do you ask am I homeless? Since my parents disliked me with a passion.

Just because I majored in Floral Design at BYU Idaho and the weather was horrible so no one in the world was able to plant flowers. So there goes the floral design industry!

I tried to find jobs, but my stink rays eminating from my body made the interviewers shriek in horror.

Of course, I DID try to take a shower.

In the drinking fountains.

Didn't work.

Very sticky indeed.

I was a hobo and no one liked me.

I hope this isn't deja vu.

"I just realized I've been wearing my shirt backwards.. I've been wearing it for hours."

You know, there's one thing I REALLY hate about moving to a new house.

Whenever I'm wandering in the dark trying to find my way I usually:

a. Run into a wall
b. Run into the fridge
c. Run into a picture,
d. Run into a door
e. Run into a table
f. Run into a door hinge
g. All of the above


I haven't ran into a door hinge not once but three times already since August.

All three caused me on limping for at least 48 hours with a bruised pinkie.

Two of them caused me to cry and crazily roll around on the floor.

One caused me to have part of my pinkie toenail ripped off. [Beautiful thought I know.]

Oh yeah, and if I ever try to use my hands to feel the walls, I usually aim wrong and I get bruises.

I fail at walking in the dark.

"I burned the chow!"

Last night I was talking to Chris and I had a craving for popcorn.

I hunt for the microwaved popcorn and put it in for 2:50, thinking that would be a sufficient amount of time.

Oh, it was sufficient enough.

I smelt something nasty and I take out the popcorn 10 seconds early.

I go sit down and I stare at the popcorn and I open it and a waft of nasty burning badness poofs on my face.

I cough, choke, and make very dramatic faces while my eyes water in pain because the smell is so atrocious!

I observe the popcorn...


It looks better in picture than reality. There were some whole pieces that were burnt black all the way through!

I ate some of it anyways, but when my parents came home they begged me to throw away the popcorn outside.

I ate some more, and THEN I finally took it out to the trash.

The house smelled so bad, we lighted the candle 'Leaves' and it didn't do any good. Then I sprayed the whole house with Lysol. It didn't work.

We need to upgrade to Febreze.

It brought back memories when it was about 4 years ago when I was 12 and I'd always eat Easy Mac.

I made some Easy Mac as usual and I thought to myself, man, that was really easy to make.

Once again, it smelled a little funny in our house but I thought nothing of it. Our windows were open and I was probably smelling something from outside.

The microwave beeps and I open the door and a whole cloud of smoke comes straight for me and I hack like an old lady!

Oh I wish I could have taken a picture of this, but I had forgotten to put water in my Easy Mac and all of the pasta was burnt black.

It smelled for almost a day before the house smelled normal, just like the popcorn fiasco.

The house smells normal now, until next time.

"Too lazy to put on clothes? Please tell me you aren't a nudist."

I've taken a shower and forgotten to bring my towels back into the bathroom at least four times.

Of course, there's nothing I can do about it considering my bedroom is down the hallway and I'd rather not run amok.

I scour around trying to find something to dry myself off with and all I find is washcloths.

AH! I'm naked!


Luckily, I was able to find a spare towel in the cabinets.

I really need to learn to put my towels back in the bathroom.

"Oh don't even GO there girlfriend. ROODE. -snaps fingers- "

I really enjoyed practice today when the directors were having their meeting.

Allyson and I were chilling in the front row of the theatre and we noticed that Victor, Afari, Madison, Samuel, and a many other people were playing with color guard flags.

Allyson and I looked at each other, and said that we should become ninjas and sneak up on them.

Of course, we go the long way and we go through the seats, crouching down.

Then crouching became crawling.

Then crawling became laughter and falling on your face since I was acting like I was crawling like I was underneath barbed wire at boot camp.

I'm not surprised when we finally got there [we gave up half way through] everyone was staring at us and said they heard us.

Yeah.. I wouldn't be surprised if the whole theater heard us.

""I wonder what's it like to make out with a cow."

I realized here in Morgan Hill, I have a lot of family.

1. Two husbands - CJ and Chris
2. Two wives - Justine and Hannah (she's not technically in Morgan Hill, but still)
3. Three daughters - Stephanie, Jackie and Lilly
4. Grand kids - Jessica, Ashley + the whole drama class
5. Four younger sisters - Allyson, Corey, Madison, Allegra
6. Five younger brothers - Afari, Jim, Johnathan, Kalum and Samuel
7. One cousin - Lexie
8. One sister-in-law - Aureli

Man, I think Stockton has some competition for having the most family already.